This is the first draft of your memoir and for the first time you’re writing down what really happened – who said what and who actually did what, who left whom and what came out of nowhere and what secrets were revealed and how could they? It’s the WTF draft and you’re shocked and bereft and angry and/or knocked out by the dark humor, the insanity, of it all over again. I mean you’re writing a book about all this so it’s gotta be something huge, right? And when reliving it on the page for the first time all you can think is WTF! (When students read from this draft in class they often look up and in anguished tones say, “This really happened.”)

This of course will not be your final draft – you will more than likely subtract and add stuff, maybe forget linear time, get more honest and at the same time more distant from your material.You’ll craft the whole mess in subsequent drafts, you’ll deal with language and tone and theme and narrative. But this time around you’re retelling the story to yourself for the first time. It’s a brave thing to do – as is all writing. But WTF. This really happened.